TEARS rolling down---

MaggieRedwings · Post by **MaggieRedwings** » Mon Dec 12, 2011 6:09 am

I totally understand Barbara.

Had a major meltdown on Friday about the holiday and being just the 2 of us alone. Had to look at it another way and realize I am having Christmas with my best friend - Frank. We are going away to one of my boss' homes just so I am not around the house. Frank, me and by boss' dog Bella.

I will be thinking of you and hoping that you have a ray of sunshine on the holiday.

Love, Maggie

nancyl · Post by **nancyl** » Mon Dec 12, 2011 7:53 am

The holidays can be tough. It seems like you miss everyone who is gone 100 times more. It's all so much fun when the kids are little and you can still live the magic through them. I am one of the lucky ones and will have my kids and grandkids here and I wish I could have all of you too. I live in a small cape with no dining room. So, imagine 13 people at the dinner table in my small kitchen. Now, I just have to try not getting stressed about this dinner. I don't want a set back.

Leslie, we too celebrate Hannakah. My daughter married a wonderful man about 27 years ago who is Jewish and she converted. So, we celebrate both, which has always been pretty neat. In our family it's not all about presents, we each pick one name so all we have to buy is one present with a dollar limit. Of course all the grandkids are grown and working except for one.

Joe, I think a quiet day at the ocean in Maine sounds great, so peaceful this time of year.

I do hope you all have a wonderful holiday, no matter how or where you celebrate. And, just remember, it's only for 24 hours, then you can hit the stores for all those after holiday sales.

Love to all of you,
Nancy

humbird753 · Post by **humbird753** » Mon Dec 12, 2011 10:23 pm

Sheila - Thank you for that quote. It says it all.

Paula

Lesley · Post by **Lesley** » Mon Dec 12, 2011 10:45 pm

Hanukkah was never about presents for us growing up. We got chocolate coins on the first night and that was it. In Israel people get together to light candles and eat latkes and donuts, and to sing Hanukkah songs together.

Sharaine · Post by **Sharaine** » Tue Dec 13, 2011 5:50 pm

I appreciate everyone's thoughts on the Holidays. I find myself missing my Grandma and Grandpa a lot during these times. We'd always drive back to Mt. Vernon, Illinois from Albuquerque during the first few years of my life. Daddy was an only child, but he had aunts and uncles and cousins. We'd get together and open presents, but the most important fun was being with family and having wonderful meals together. I try to recreate some of that magic, but since Randall and I don't have children, it doesn't translate exactly right.

This year we are having friends over who have two little boys, ages 3 and 6, for Christmas dinner in the afternoon. It will be fun.

I wish everyone here Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all. Thank you for being a part of my life! You teach me a great deal.

Love, Sharaine

sarkin · Post by **sarkin** » Tue Dec 13, 2011 9:00 pm

Sharaine,

Wishing you all the joys of the season, too!

I grew up with "mixed traditions" - I am generally all about the yes. (Except regarding food toxins - then I am the Queen of NO.) I'll be singing a Christmas concert with a small group to benefit the Brooklyn Conservatory Chorale (yay!), and expecting Christmas-celebrating family, though we generally don't do a big 'thing' here... we light Chanukah candles, though... and might go out and buy a tree on 12/24, if the Sweden branch of the clan feels that's the right thing to do. My Polish husband's tradition is to celebrate Christmas Eve, and that's the Swedish way as well. Already pondering the menu (cranberry sorbet will absolutely be included, which should thrill the lingonberry-adoring crowd...).

Polish tradition includes a special sharing of oplatek - (with a line through the L - pronounced opwatek), and wishing each other person blessings for the holiday and the year. It is made, of course!, with flour and water, and resembles communion wafers. If we were spending the holiday with his side of the family, I might even be working on a substitute. I shall, instead, be feeding my share to the dog ;) Legend has it that animals who eat oplatek on Christmas Eve will speak with human voices by midnight, but only the pure of heart shall hear them. I am guessing that feeding my special share to the dog disqualifies me...

Barbara, I'll be thinking of you... and of all of us, for whatever shared joy will light the waning hours and days of 2011.

Love,
Sara

Andi · Post by **Andi** » Thu Dec 15, 2011 5:41 pm

Barbara and others,
I am so sorry for your losses of loved ones and the fact that it takes the joy away from the season for you.
I am Jewish, never had a Christmas tree till I met my (now) husband. But there has always been something about this season that I love, eventhough I never celebrated Christmas till I met Dave 6 years ago. I guess it is just something in the air, and the feeling that anything is possible.
Maybe because it is new to me, but going to get our tree, decorating it,and listening to holiday music puts much joy in my heart.
I know what it is like to lose a loved one, but I am always just thankful for the time I had with them. Memories can never be taken from you.
I spent many a Christmas alone (but again,I am Jewish so it was not a big deal to me) and it was a great time to reflect and just get inside my head. Now I have my husband and enjoy celebrating it with him. We light the Hanukkah candles together for me, and put up the Christmas tree together for him. And we celebrate the solstice together.
Living in Vermont does add something to the season I guess.
But true peace and joy comes from within. In this life if we are lucky enough to have loved ones, then we have to face the fact that in our lifetime we may lose some of them.
Please try to take solace in the fact that you loved,and were loved back. I am sure your brother would be very sad to know how much you are hurting. Take in all the good things about the season, and send it to him in a prayer. Live it for him right now because I am sure if he was still alilve he would be taking it all in.
We all will leave this earth eventually, I for one think it is important to consider every day a gift and to take time to appreciate all that is around us.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and a Happy New Year to everyone on this forum.

Stanz · Post by **Stanz** » Fri Dec 16, 2011 12:22 am

I LOVE what you said, Andi, my husband is Jewish, I'm the shiksa or however that's spelled, too tired to sus it out, it's been a long day. We live, we love, we lose, neither of us care about religion. I agree it's important to remember that every day is a gift.

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah from the resident atheist. I love you all.

humbird753 · Post by **humbird753** » Fri Dec 16, 2011 12:10 pm

Andi,

Those are wonderful thoughts - and very true.

Paula