Down in the dumps, anyone?

Lucy · Post by **Lucy** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 1:51 am

Haven't been feeling too well lately, for some reason, so possibly that's what's got me down a bit today.

Anyway, I really hate to see December come, to tell you the truth. I can remember when it was so enjoyable being able to get out with friends and do things, and now, Mom and I are stuck here all day long both Christmas and New Year's.

How's everyone else doing re: the holiday season?

Yours, Luce

hazel · Post by **hazel** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 7:57 am

for Lucy

for Mom

hazel

barbaranoela · Post by **barbaranoela** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 8:39 am

Dear Lucy---

Yes, I know how U feel---I get the HOLIDAY BLUES----even when my family was all together----when I sat alone and listened to CAROLS--

Now even more so,since my brother died last year----he was my CHRISTMAS---he luved this holiday --now he celebrates with all the family up in the blue skies of heaven--

Most of my friends have re-located to other states---so we dont see them-
What I miss too is the OPEN HOUSE festivities that we had @ our house on the EVE~~~the entire neighborhood--Lou's cooking all the Italians goodies---now ZIPPO!!!

Just know we luve U Lucy---and a big HUG for U and mom--

luve Barbara

jenilake · Post by **jenilake** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 10:18 am

Hi Lucy,

I lost my husband at a young age...20. My mom died on Dec. 29th, 1978.

My dad and brother died a few years later. My best friend died of cancer a couple years ago.

With each of those things I lost a little of myself, and the joy I used to feel at this time of year. It just isn't the same anymore.

I can just imagine how you must feel, with your mom sick and being cooped up in the house. I think a lot of people feel blue this time of year.

I hope you can come out of this to have some fun.

I hope this wasn't too morose for you, I just have been feeling the same way. I'm waiting for spring.

and

KathyP

starfire · Post by **starfire** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 10:31 am

Lucy,
I can certainly understand your feelings. It has to be so very hard to be so tied down consistantly. I wish there was some way to give you some "freedom", at least for a few hours a week. No matter how much you love your Mom (and I know you do) and want to care for her (as you obviously do), you still need some time for yourself to relax and do something enjoyable.

Is there no one who could stay with your Mom for a few hours now and then?

I will certainly be remembering you in my prayers.

Shirley

m · Post by m » Sun Dec 11, 2005 4:54 pm

Luce,
I'm sorry. It IS a drag to be housebound, more or less, especially this time of year. I remember feeling the same when my mom was alive. I started trying to do little bitty things to make the holiday more like it use to be. I didn't feel much like it, but I did decorate a bit, watched Rudolph and lit a fire. It helped a little.
Try to keep your chin up.
m

Peggy · Post by **Peggy** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 5:55 pm

Kathy and Luce,

This time of year can be very hard for some - I'm truly sorry to hear that it is affecting you both the way it is.

Ron brought me home a poinsetta today, I hung a wreath on my door, and I almost have enough Christmas cards to hang up around the dining room. I'm starting to feel a little Christmassy and enjoying it. I'm almost all organized with the few things I plan to do, so am avoiding the stress this time of year can bring.

Come here and talk whenever you need to, that's one of the big reasons we're here.

Much love,
Peg

annie oakley · Post by **annie oakley** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 6:44 pm

YES!!!!!!!!! bETWEEN gOING IN DEBT UP TO MY ARM PITS AND THE HOLIDAYS!!!!

barbaranoela · Post by **barbaranoela** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 7:17 pm

Bless your sweet heart Calamity!!!!!!
U always come up with the best things-----

blessings Calamity

luve Barbara

Liz · Post by **Liz** » Sun Dec 11, 2005 7:26 pm

Hi Lucy

You must be feeling very lonely & unhappy. You undoubtedly need a bit of a break. Much as you love your Mum, it is a strain on you. Is there anyone who could sit with her for a while just so you could have a little time to yourself. Perhaps to go & visit a friend.

My Mum was ill for some years before she died on 14th December ten years ago. She lived mainly with my elder sister but spent 2-3 month periods with me & also with my younger sister. She needed full time care & could not be left alone. Much as we loved her we needed to work together so that no one of us had the responsibility of her care for too long without a break.

We think of her all the time but at Christmas she is even more in our thoughts.

Love

Liz

Lucy · Post by **Lucy** » Mon Dec 12, 2005 1:29 am

Thanks everyone! Really don't know where I would go if I DID get out. Had a few wild ideas, like thought about taking Mom and checking into a nice hotel that would be all decorated, and have lots of visitors to town, most likely. We could just sit and people watch, as in REAL people! Ha! I think that would be great for Mom rather than to have to just stare at me all day Christmas.

Might have to have reservations, but I'll just bet there'd be a nice gf restaurant or two open for at least one meal Christmas day, and might could even get the two of them close together.

Heck, might just go sit in a hotel lobby all day except for eating out, and then sleep here! Hahaha!

I'm hoping that Mom's friend will be feeling well enough for our usual annual visit -- they've been friends since junior high, and are like sisters. She lives in a seniors place that resembles a hotel in some ways, and in the lobby, they always have a big tree, and lots of decorations. We used to be invited to go and eat with this friend, but I seriously doubt that we'd be able to find anything I'd trust to eat due to the "allergens." Guess we'll just go visit if she's up to it, and the weather permits, which it usually does around here. I'm assuming that Mom will be up to it.

Today, as described more fully in the dietary treatment section of this site, I began having cramps in my fingers, then feet, and legs which were "doozies" as my sister described them. (She just was here when the ones in my fingers had started.)

Anyway, I suspected that it was low calcium due to my diet that caused those terrible cramps, and possibly even the "down" feeling,, so I began pushing the supplements, and I seem to be feeling better now.

Sometimes it helps to just get your feelings out, and have responses such as the ones you sweet people have made, so thank you all very much!

Yours, Luce

MaggieRedwings · Post by **MaggieRedwings** » Mon Dec 12, 2005 5:13 am

Hi Lucy,

You are not alone!! I have been terribly in the dumps and just can't shake the blue mood. I have been working 70+ hr. weeks and it just does not seem that I have any time for me and Frank and I am sure that is the contributing factor. I also have a very hard time with holiday seasons and this adds to the mix.

Hopefully we will both be out of our funk real soon.

Love, Maggie

Lucy · Post by **Lucy** » Mon Dec 12, 2005 10:44 pm

Wow, Maggie, 70 hrs is too much! Hope you're feeling better soon, and somehow get some time off to share some good times with Frank.

Yours, Luce

Alice · Post by **Alice** » Tue Dec 13, 2005 6:32 am

Lucy,

It must be a lonely feeling to be stuck at home with your mom. Bruce and I are often alone on major holidays. Not quite the same though, because we can entertain or go out if we chose. But this year I'm not feeling very social and am grieving for my mom and dad. They both died this year and it's our first Christmas without them.

I suspect there are many others who find this to be a difficult time of year. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers

Love,
Alice

Wendy · Post by **Wendy** » Thu Dec 15, 2005 7:09 pm

I would imagine it is very hard for you all year long, but seeing and watching others visiting and going to parties and just being able to get out can be enough to bring in the gloom. Been there, done that too. Perhaps at other times, but it is the same thing, that feeling in the heart that something is missing and you just can't fill it. I am having another reason for finding these holidays difficult, and that is that I still have nothing done, and I usually have it finished by the end of Nov. at the latest. This year, the fatigue is worse then ever and being weak, going out in crowds is just overwhelming to me. I also have been panicing way too much, about everything. I think mainly because I think that I am the one who is supposed to be the one who does it all for the kids. When my kids tell me MOM the gifts are not the most important thing, its the getting together with all the family and spending time with each other. I still think I sould be doing more, but I just can't dig it up from inside of me. I am getting through it, but it is not easy. I also know about being alone now, and remember times in the past where my home was always the center of attention, now its a rarity. And for other reasons once I divorced I lost what friends I did have, so there is no one to call when I feel like this either. Hence, there is no whre to go either, except for my brothers. But he is going to our brothers place for Christmas, but I didn't want to not spend this time with my girls, so I am staying here. So I can understand a bit of what you are going through, not all though. I think that taking care of an ill parent can take its toll on you if you don't have some kind of break from it. If you also don't work out of the house, you would also not have as many outside contacts either. That is the part I can understand, and in itself can be very hard.
Talking about it helps me to get through it, maybe this will help you also.

Many Gentle Hugs Coming your way
Wendy :bigbighug:

MICROSCOPIC COLITIS SUPPORT

Down in the dumps, anyone?

Down in the dumps, anyone?

HOLIDAY BLUES

OMA