Dear all,
I wish you a happy new year for all of you.
I am struggling with how to eat dinner, in combination with my husband.
In the past he cooked for a few years for us both and that was ok. He knew my diet and adapted to it. But about a half year ago we decided to make our own meals. The main reason was that he wanted to eat less meat and more variety, like beans, artificial meat and nightshade. Since then we make our own meals and I have to admit that I like it to be totally responsible for my own food en it makes life in a way much more easy, although I miss his dinners. In between we had a period that I cooked tree times a week for both of us, but this didn't work good.
I am on a strict diet sinds several years and I feel most of the time ok with it, but what happens more and more is that I find it difficult to see my husband eating all kinds of things, that I can't. It triggers me a lot. I think, its is a great deal just jealousy.
But I also noticed that if people eat things I like in front of my nose, I tend to take a very little bit of it, for example a quarter of a tiny peace of chocolate. Then I know how it tast. With christmas we had a star icecreamdessert covered with chocolate and I took an extreme tiny piece, just to taste what they tasted. That didn't give me trouble with my intestines.
But last sunday my husband eat the leftover of the desert in front of me after dinner and I realised that, although I was becoming sick and did not want it at all, that this bothered me in a enormous way. That afternoon I had eaten a piece of chocolate of him (there are continually chocolate and sweats on the table, etc., I mean where I can see it and in fact I have to resist it all the time). It was in my mouth before I realized what I had done.
In the evening and night I have been so terrible sick: nausea, vomitting all night and of course d. my hole intestinal system was one big very painful block. This was on sunday and yesterday I spend in bed and I wonder: was it that piece of chocolate (possibly in combination with two classes of champagne the evening before) or was it a virus? And if it is a virus, why am I the only one with this sickness? Yes, i know the answer on the last question: I am much more vulnerable for viruses than others.
What happens since we eat different meals, is that it triggers me more and more, not in the least because It disturbs me that his meals are in my opinion not healthy. Of course that is his responsibility, but I think at the moment that it is my responsibility to protect myself against the confrontation with this.
Haven written this, I know what the best option is for me, but it will be disappointing for him.
I always told everybody that the fact that I can't eat things does not mean that they can't take them either and I mean that. They often thought on party's for example that it is difficult for me to see them eating. That wasn't the point, but of course it was not nice, that I couldn't eat the food, but I could manage it, also because I know why I don't take it. But now I realize that this was on party's and therefore incidentally.
I still feel a bit sick and maybe thats the reason that I exaggerate, but I should like to hear about your experiences with this issue and especially with daily dinners together with others, like your partner. And of course I would like to hear your advice and opinion.
Thank you, Sonja
eating with others
Moderators: Rosie, Stanz, Jean, CAMary, moremuscle, JFR, Dee, xet, Peggy, Matthew, Gabes-Apg, grannyh, Gloria, Mars, starfire, Polly, Joefnh
Re: eating with others
Hello Sonja,
I live alone, so I don't have that problem. Occasionally, though, I do eat with others, or at least I did before the pandemic. But it was only occasionally, so it never was a problem for me, I just ignored them, and whatever they were eating didn't bother me one bit. But I can see how it might be a problem when you're eating every meal with someone who's eating foods that you still crave.
I've been thinking about your problem ever since I noticed your post this morning, and I thought that by now, maybe someone else would be offering their thoughts. I see that they haven't, but I thought of something this afternoon that might work. Here's what I would do:
I would talk it over with him and figure out a schedule for spacing out meals, so that the 2 of you will never be eating at the same time. He should understand, if he cares about your health, and I'm sure he does. If you can drink coffee, for example, you might have your morning coffee together. But if he has to be eating something that you can't have, whenever he drinks coffee, then that won't work.
it's important not to be sampling even tiny amounts of the foods that you can't tolerate, because that will keep your immune system on high alert at all times, so that it will be more likely for you to react, if you accidentally slip up. And as you found out, it doesn't take much to make you sick, when your immune system is extra sensitive.
Or alternatively, you could eat in different rooms, if you want to eat at the same time. Or how about this idea? You could make a cardboard partition that you could tape across the middle of the table, just tall enough so that you can't see what he's eating, but you can still carry on normal conversations.
These may be crackpot ideas, but if watching your husband eat foods that you can't have is causing health problems for you, somewhere out there, there's a solution that will work for you, and it's important to find it. When ordinary solutions don't work, we have to solve difficult problems by thinking "out of the box".
I hope this will at least give you (or some other member reading this) some ideas that you can use to work out a solution. controlling this disease is difficult enough, without being tempted by what others are eating.
I hope this helps,
Tex
I live alone, so I don't have that problem. Occasionally, though, I do eat with others, or at least I did before the pandemic. But it was only occasionally, so it never was a problem for me, I just ignored them, and whatever they were eating didn't bother me one bit. But I can see how it might be a problem when you're eating every meal with someone who's eating foods that you still crave.
I've been thinking about your problem ever since I noticed your post this morning, and I thought that by now, maybe someone else would be offering their thoughts. I see that they haven't, but I thought of something this afternoon that might work. Here's what I would do:
I would talk it over with him and figure out a schedule for spacing out meals, so that the 2 of you will never be eating at the same time. He should understand, if he cares about your health, and I'm sure he does. If you can drink coffee, for example, you might have your morning coffee together. But if he has to be eating something that you can't have, whenever he drinks coffee, then that won't work.
it's important not to be sampling even tiny amounts of the foods that you can't tolerate, because that will keep your immune system on high alert at all times, so that it will be more likely for you to react, if you accidentally slip up. And as you found out, it doesn't take much to make you sick, when your immune system is extra sensitive.
Or alternatively, you could eat in different rooms, if you want to eat at the same time. Or how about this idea? You could make a cardboard partition that you could tape across the middle of the table, just tall enough so that you can't see what he's eating, but you can still carry on normal conversations.
These may be crackpot ideas, but if watching your husband eat foods that you can't have is causing health problems for you, somewhere out there, there's a solution that will work for you, and it's important to find it. When ordinary solutions don't work, we have to solve difficult problems by thinking "out of the box".
I hope this will at least give you (or some other member reading this) some ideas that you can use to work out a solution. controlling this disease is difficult enough, without being tempted by what others are eating.
I hope this helps,
Tex
It is suspected that some of the hardest material known to science can be found in the skulls of GI specialists who insist that diet has nothing to do with the treatment of microscopic colitis.
Re: eating with others
Dear Tex,
Thank you very much for your answers and your thinking of solutions for me. I am very happy and thankful that I can communicate with you about this subject.
I have to admit that yesterday I felt so bad that this problem looked more severe for me than it most of the times is.
Normally I can see people eat and I regularly even make sandwiches with cheese (the food I miss most of all) for my grandchildren if necessary.
I am very happy that my diet works so well, thanks to you / this forum. And there is since years no graving any more for most things, like cheese and bread.
But it seems now that I have especially a problem with the sweet things, like chocolate, while I was not somebody who was addicted to that kind of things before. I always liked more the salt than the sweet. December is always the month that there is a lot of sweets in my home and much of family things with food (also my birthday). I am the one, who buys it, because its my tradition and belongs for me to this feasts. (Because I can't eat them, I see no reason why I shouldn't give it to others, but maybe I have to reconsider this.) And in these days I tend to take very tiny pieces, maybe once a week, but nevertheless.
I should like to know so much what was the cause of my sickness. Was it a virus or was it the food that made me so terrible sick? I understand that you think it might indeed have been the food. Maybe you don't know anything about this details and I hesitate to write down this clinical symptoms, however I know that this is the place where that is possible. I had such a terrible nausea and there was no 'natural' vomitting, so I stayed in bed waiting for this to go away, but it went worse and worse and there were waves with sour from my stomach into my throat. Terrible pain in my hole testinal system. It took some hours before I had the courage to go to the bathroom to vomit. After that I feeled a bit of relief, but the pain in my nose and throat was like there was hydrochloric acid in it. I had to go to the bathroom to vomit two more times, the last at 5.30, making sure that there was really nothing left but mucus, about 14 hours after my 'sickness' began.
In the meantime of all this I had diarree of course, but that is something I am very familiar with.
While I was sick I also had joint pain in the places I normally have if I react to something, for example one knee, quite severe. In the morning my temperature was 37.4. this morning 36.7.
What I wonder especially is why did I not threw up spontaneously? That should be the natural reaction. Can this be related to the cause?
I would really like to know the cause, because this will (if it is probably food) of course help me in the future to stick even more strict to my diet.
But here is also the question of the eating together and I think your first suggestion is the best: I have to speak about this with my husband. I have to admit that I do have a problem with him eating certain things, especially while I am eating my own meal. I think that that is especially the point: I am happy with what I (can) eat and I like it to be concentrated on my food while eating. Food is my medicine and maybe I have to admit to myself that I like to be on my own at these moments. Maybe that is the main thing. While writing I come to this point, so this forum is really, really very very helpful for me.
Dear Tex, thank you so much for everything. I appreciate it more than I can write.
Sonja
PS Maybe I should make a new post about the nausea question, what do you think?
Thank you very much for your answers and your thinking of solutions for me. I am very happy and thankful that I can communicate with you about this subject.
I have to admit that yesterday I felt so bad that this problem looked more severe for me than it most of the times is.
Normally I can see people eat and I regularly even make sandwiches with cheese (the food I miss most of all) for my grandchildren if necessary.
I am very happy that my diet works so well, thanks to you / this forum. And there is since years no graving any more for most things, like cheese and bread.
But it seems now that I have especially a problem with the sweet things, like chocolate, while I was not somebody who was addicted to that kind of things before. I always liked more the salt than the sweet. December is always the month that there is a lot of sweets in my home and much of family things with food (also my birthday). I am the one, who buys it, because its my tradition and belongs for me to this feasts. (Because I can't eat them, I see no reason why I shouldn't give it to others, but maybe I have to reconsider this.) And in these days I tend to take very tiny pieces, maybe once a week, but nevertheless.
I should like to know so much what was the cause of my sickness. Was it a virus or was it the food that made me so terrible sick? I understand that you think it might indeed have been the food. Maybe you don't know anything about this details and I hesitate to write down this clinical symptoms, however I know that this is the place where that is possible. I had such a terrible nausea and there was no 'natural' vomitting, so I stayed in bed waiting for this to go away, but it went worse and worse and there were waves with sour from my stomach into my throat. Terrible pain in my hole testinal system. It took some hours before I had the courage to go to the bathroom to vomit. After that I feeled a bit of relief, but the pain in my nose and throat was like there was hydrochloric acid in it. I had to go to the bathroom to vomit two more times, the last at 5.30, making sure that there was really nothing left but mucus, about 14 hours after my 'sickness' began.
In the meantime of all this I had diarree of course, but that is something I am very familiar with.
While I was sick I also had joint pain in the places I normally have if I react to something, for example one knee, quite severe. In the morning my temperature was 37.4. this morning 36.7.What I wonder especially is why did I not threw up spontaneously? That should be the natural reaction. Can this be related to the cause?
I would really like to know the cause, because this will (if it is probably food) of course help me in the future to stick even more strict to my diet.
But here is also the question of the eating together and I think your first suggestion is the best: I have to speak about this with my husband. I have to admit that I do have a problem with him eating certain things, especially while I am eating my own meal. I think that that is especially the point: I am happy with what I (can) eat and I like it to be concentrated on my food while eating. Food is my medicine and maybe I have to admit to myself that I like to be on my own at these moments. Maybe that is the main thing. While writing I come to this point, so this forum is really, really very very helpful for me.
Dear Tex, thank you so much for everything. I appreciate it more than I can write.
Sonja
PS Maybe I should make a new post about the nausea question, what do you think?
Re: eating with others
Hi, Sonja. I've been living wit LC for seven years now. When I initially changed my diet I prepared two meals, one for me and one for my son & my husband. It was tiresome, but I knew that I couldn't eat like they did and they weren't willing to eat like I did (and I can't say that I blame them for that). Since my husband retired he has been making his own meals, mainly because he likes to eat high fat, unhealthy foods and that's not what I prepared for him. It's his life and if he wants to eat like that, it's on him, he's an adult. Since my diagnosis I have never cheated, not one bite of anything that I thought would make me sick. I remember all too well how sick I was and I never want to go there again. I do eat chocolate, but it's gluten and dairy free. I take my own food everywhere -- parties, weddings, picnics. I won't take the chance on getting glutened. I didn't eat out for a long time, but I do now and I take two GlutenEase before I eat and order everything plain, and explain that I have "food allergies" (it's not an allergy, but servers seem to understand the word allergy) and hope for the best. It's like playing Russian roulette, I never know how I will feel afterwards. ASs we share the kitchen, my husband is careful in not leaving crumbs around and I have my own cookware. I hope this is helpful to you. This isn't the life that we would choose, but we have to make the best of it. One of my favorite cookbooks is Against All Grain by Danielle Walker. She has ulcerative colitis and is gluten & dairy free. Best wishes on your journey to healing.
Marcia
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My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
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My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
Re: eating with others
HI Marcia,
This surely is very, very, very helpful. Most of the things you write, I recognize. I also don't eat out, only if it is really necessary. And I was very strict, but I have gone wrong and I have been punished so badly. I still want to know if it was really not a virus and I hope a get an answer to that, because I know that it will really help me to go forward on my path and, in a way, it makes it far more easy if it was not a virus, because I was so terribly enormous ill and I want to do anything to pretend that I will ever have to experience this again.
This was more severe than any intestinal problems that I ever have had. Thus maybe I needed one more lesson......to know it once and for all.
Thank you so much. It helps me to know that you and your husband (and probably others in our situation) also make their own meals. That I don't have to feel guilty about that.
I am also for seven years on a gluten-free diet and it took me years to find out all my sensitivities. I feel so good if I stick to my save foods that there were moment that I thought: is this strict diet really necessary? But your story have strengthened me, just as Tex's words did.
You are right: it is not the life that we would have choosen, but this comes on our path and I am very thankful for what I can eat and what makes me healthy.
So thank you one more time.
Sonja
This surely is very, very, very helpful. Most of the things you write, I recognize. I also don't eat out, only if it is really necessary. And I was very strict, but I have gone wrong and I have been punished so badly. I still want to know if it was really not a virus and I hope a get an answer to that, because I know that it will really help me to go forward on my path and, in a way, it makes it far more easy if it was not a virus, because I was so terribly enormous ill and I want to do anything to pretend that I will ever have to experience this again.
This was more severe than any intestinal problems that I ever have had. Thus maybe I needed one more lesson......to know it once and for all.
Thank you so much. It helps me to know that you and your husband (and probably others in our situation) also make their own meals. That I don't have to feel guilty about that.
I am also for seven years on a gluten-free diet and it took me years to find out all my sensitivities. I feel so good if I stick to my save foods that there were moment that I thought: is this strict diet really necessary? But your story have strengthened me, just as Tex's words did.
You are right: it is not the life that we would have choosen, but this comes on our path and I am very thankful for what I can eat and what makes me healthy.
So thank you one more time.
Sonja
Re: eating with others
Hi, Sonja. I'm happy to help in whatever way that I can. I'm not an "expert" like many on here, but I can help by sharing my experience with LC. We're all in this together.
Marcia
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My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
------------
My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
Re: eating with others
Sonja,
MC does not cause fever. If you had a temperature of 37.4 (99.32 degrees F), you had some kind of virus, or an acute diverticulitis attack. But if you had diverticulitis it wouldn't end in one day, it would last for a week or 2. I'm surprised your husband hasn't caught it. That makes me wonder if you might have caught the omicron variant of Covid, and your husband has it, but he's asymptomatic. Obviously, I may be wrong, because I certainly can't diagnose anyone from thousands of miles away, but that wasn't a normal MC reaction to a food sensitivity. It probably was just some kind of stomach virus of the type that often goes around, but if it was, your husband will be very lucky if he doesn't catch it.
Tex
MC does not cause fever. If you had a temperature of 37.4 (99.32 degrees F), you had some kind of virus, or an acute diverticulitis attack. But if you had diverticulitis it wouldn't end in one day, it would last for a week or 2. I'm surprised your husband hasn't caught it. That makes me wonder if you might have caught the omicron variant of Covid, and your husband has it, but he's asymptomatic. Obviously, I may be wrong, because I certainly can't diagnose anyone from thousands of miles away, but that wasn't a normal MC reaction to a food sensitivity. It probably was just some kind of stomach virus of the type that often goes around, but if it was, your husband will be very lucky if he doesn't catch it.
Tex
It is suspected that some of the hardest material known to science can be found in the skulls of GI specialists who insist that diet has nothing to do with the treatment of microscopic colitis.
Re: eating with others
Thank you Tex for this information.
I had a cold with problems with my throat from christmas evening until sunday 2 januari. I thought I might have corona, so I did twice a selftest, which was negative. Sunday the second was the first day I felt better and then I got the intestinal problems. On monday I did again a selftest: also negative. Because I wanted to be really sure, I made an appointment for an official coronatest. I did this also because I reacted badly on my second vaccin (pfizer) and since that moment I have more issues with food, especially with joint pains. I had the impression I react more than earlier.
I don't want a booster, until it is really necessary for my qr code. When I have had covid, I can wait longer with the booster, so I thought. My husband had the booster last week. I have to admit that I don't know what kind of symptoms omikron gives, I thought especially throat problems.
I am going to sleep now. Tomorrow I have the appointment for the test and they told me I will be informed about the result within 48 hours. Now I am even more curious. I will post, as soon as I have the result.
But virus or food: this experience was a good lesson for me for not cheating any more with food, also not in the slightest way.
Thank you.
Sonja
I had a cold with problems with my throat from christmas evening until sunday 2 januari. I thought I might have corona, so I did twice a selftest, which was negative. Sunday the second was the first day I felt better and then I got the intestinal problems. On monday I did again a selftest: also negative. Because I wanted to be really sure, I made an appointment for an official coronatest. I did this also because I reacted badly on my second vaccin (pfizer) and since that moment I have more issues with food, especially with joint pains. I had the impression I react more than earlier.
I don't want a booster, until it is really necessary for my qr code. When I have had covid, I can wait longer with the booster, so I thought. My husband had the booster last week. I have to admit that I don't know what kind of symptoms omikron gives, I thought especially throat problems.
I am going to sleep now. Tomorrow I have the appointment for the test and they told me I will be informed about the result within 48 hours. Now I am even more curious. I will post, as soon as I have the result.
But virus or food: this experience was a good lesson for me for not cheating any more with food, also not in the slightest way.
Thank you.
Sonja
Re: eating with others
Hi all,
I got the result: negative for covid.
I am still wondering: why was I so very sick? I think Tex is possibly right with the suggestion that I undermined my imuumsystem by not keeping me strict to my diet. I hope this is a good lesson for me.
Sonja
I got the result: negative for covid.
I am still wondering: why was I so very sick? I think Tex is possibly right with the suggestion that I undermined my imuumsystem by not keeping me strict to my diet. I hope this is a good lesson for me.
Sonja
Re: eating with others
Hi, Sonja. That's good news that your test was negative! We have a lot of positive results in my area right now. It makes me want to hibernate for the winter! I try to walk outside every day and I believe that helps my immune system.
Marcia
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My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
------------
My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
Re: eating with others
Hi Marcia,
Thanks for your answer. Walking is good and if possible I walk also every day, certainly now we are in lockdown since 3 weeks. Normally I swim 5 times a week one hour and afterwards I go to the sauna. Sauna seems to be very good for your imumesystem. The last 3 weeks sauna en swimming was unfortunately not possible because of the lockdown and maybe that is part of the problem. If so, that is good news.
I should like it to hear if you and your husband are eating at the same time.
Tex and Marcia, i discussed the dinners with my husband and we agreed to eat on ourselves. And he totally agrees with my intention not to buy all the sweets anymore, I used to for special occasions. In the future I will only serve food and snacks that are healthy for the people I love and -if possible- which I can eat myself.
I should like to know how other members cope with this kind of issues: do you eat separate from your partner and what do you serve if people come to visit you?
Thanks, Sonja
Thanks for your answer. Walking is good and if possible I walk also every day, certainly now we are in lockdown since 3 weeks. Normally I swim 5 times a week one hour and afterwards I go to the sauna. Sauna seems to be very good for your imumesystem. The last 3 weeks sauna en swimming was unfortunately not possible because of the lockdown and maybe that is part of the problem. If so, that is good news.
I should like it to hear if you and your husband are eating at the same time.
Tex and Marcia, i discussed the dinners with my husband and we agreed to eat on ourselves. And he totally agrees with my intention not to buy all the sweets anymore, I used to for special occasions. In the future I will only serve food and snacks that are healthy for the people I love and -if possible- which I can eat myself.
I should like to know how other members cope with this kind of issues: do you eat separate from your partner and what do you serve if people come to visit you?
Thanks, Sonja
Re: eating with others
My husband & I eat at the same time occasionally. When our son was with us we all ate at the same time, but now that it's just the two of us it's not always at the same time. I want to be finished by 6:00 p.m. because I have sleep issues and I find it best that I don't eat after 6p. My husband more or less eats when he feels like it; sometimes it's earlier than I want to eat as I'm pretty much regimented in my meal times. When we have company I prepare what they eat, not what I eat. My meals are fairly bland & I don't want to cook like that for guests. I don't use regular flour in my kitchen, but I do cook regular pasta because I have separate pans, colanders, etc. for me. My husband usually makes homemade ice cream for dessert or if my guests want to bring something I suggest they bring dessert. When I bake, it's always gluten free, but I don't typically bake for guests.
Marcia
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My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
------------
My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style. - M. Angelou
Re: eating with others
Hello Sonja,
My husband and I usually eat/cook separately as well. Our children are grown, so it was easier for us to adjust. I eat mostly plain meat/veggies for protein/amino acids and he does not eat meat at all due to a strong taste preference. He eats a lot of pasta, bread and spicy foods, which are impossible for me. We both can eat plain smashed avocado and corn chips. And salmon or tuna on the first day from the fish market, but I have a histamine reaction after the second. Now that he seldom eats out (because I can’t) he says he has learned to “Eat to live not live to eat.” I do encourage him to eat out with his friends. Occasionally, he will eat something that I still crave, but I remind myself what it was like when I had WD all day and all night for 8 weeks and remind myself that it is MY choice to resist. It is now easier to avoid even a tiny bit of those foods as I NEVER want to go back to being that ill again—if I can help it.
I am only three years into this journey, so we haven’t had many guests for the last two years due to Covid. But when our adult children visit, sometimes I just eat my plain safe foods no matter what they all cook together. Or sometimes we make “buffet style” entrees, such as a “Street Taco Bar” or “Breakfast Bowl Bar” with many options served in individual bowls. Then they can choose everything and add spices separately, and I quietly choose the two or three plain options. I try to never complain, as I hate it if anyone feels sorry for me and, truly, I am so happy to sit at the table with everyone, no matter what is on any individual plate.
Eating at another home is trickier. If they are kind and know my situation, I bring my own food. If it involves too many people, and would be embarrassing to explain, I simple say either that I ate earlier or have multiple food allergies and…. Just smile, as if it is no big deal.
I don’t know if this helps, but we have to be creative to learn to live with this disease and still enjoy social occasions.
Harmony
My husband and I usually eat/cook separately as well. Our children are grown, so it was easier for us to adjust. I eat mostly plain meat/veggies for protein/amino acids and he does not eat meat at all due to a strong taste preference. He eats a lot of pasta, bread and spicy foods, which are impossible for me. We both can eat plain smashed avocado and corn chips. And salmon or tuna on the first day from the fish market, but I have a histamine reaction after the second. Now that he seldom eats out (because I can’t) he says he has learned to “Eat to live not live to eat.” I do encourage him to eat out with his friends. Occasionally, he will eat something that I still crave, but I remind myself what it was like when I had WD all day and all night for 8 weeks and remind myself that it is MY choice to resist. It is now easier to avoid even a tiny bit of those foods as I NEVER want to go back to being that ill again—if I can help it.
I am only three years into this journey, so we haven’t had many guests for the last two years due to Covid. But when our adult children visit, sometimes I just eat my plain safe foods no matter what they all cook together. Or sometimes we make “buffet style” entrees, such as a “Street Taco Bar” or “Breakfast Bowl Bar” with many options served in individual bowls. Then they can choose everything and add spices separately, and I quietly choose the two or three plain options. I try to never complain, as I hate it if anyone feels sorry for me and, truly, I am so happy to sit at the table with everyone, no matter what is on any individual plate.
Eating at another home is trickier. If they are kind and know my situation, I bring my own food. If it involves too many people, and would be embarrassing to explain, I simple say either that I ate earlier or have multiple food allergies and…. Just smile, as if it is no big deal.
I don’t know if this helps, but we have to be creative to learn to live with this disease and still enjoy social occasions.
Harmony
Some days there won't be a song in your heart. Sing anyway. —Emory Austin
Re: eating with others
hI Marcia and Harmony
Thank you for your replies. It really helps to know that we are in similar situations and I appreciate it very much to know how you cope with our disease and limitations. And also how you manage to enjoy the good things in live!
Sonja
Thank you for your replies. It really helps to know that we are in similar situations and I appreciate it very much to know how you cope with our disease and limitations. And also how you manage to enjoy the good things in live!
Sonja
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Gabes-Apg
- Emperor Penguin
- Posts: 8332
- Joined: Mon Dec 21, 2009 3:12 pm
- Location: Hunter Valley NSW Australia
Re: eating with others
I live alone so have not had to share a kitchen with others day to day.
One thing I do is bulk cook ups on the weekend so I have all my 'basics' for the week. This way through the week (as I work full time) I only have to reheat meals rather than do prep and cooking. This may help for you, that you can eat with your husband but you just have to reheat your meal.
so far as socialising. Depending on the situation /people / etc.
- sometimes I eat a large meal before going out and take a platter of 'Gabes safe' snacks to share at the occasion
- if it is formal eating, I take my own meal (all my friends know my situation and are not offended)
- a very Australian thing is cooking meat on the grill (we call it bbq) I have Gabes safe cuts pre cooked wrapped in foil that I warm on the bbq (having the foil between my food and the bbq plate protects it from vegetable oil / sauces etc that might be on the other food)
if entertaining at home, I have come up with tasty meals that are Gabes safe and others enjoy.
1. roasted chicken quarters with roast veggies (served with Gluten free gravy)
2. roasted veggies with fresh salmon (my version of fish and chips). I cook the veges in Duck fat and this gives them lovely flavour
3. pretty much any meat and veges that is 'Gabes safe' and then I have things like mustard/sauces should the other eaters want more flavour that can be added at the table.
if it is nice cuts of meat, and veges are roasted with safe fat/oil and salt there is loads of flavour.
I have adapted many recipes for sweet treats and deserts. having processed GF flours is a treat for me. generally when I prepare these items people dont even know they are gluten and dairy free!!
now that grazing boards are a entertainment fad (they are here in Aus) it is easy to prepare nibbles grazing board, or a desert grazing board and one end is the 'Gabes safe' options.
Life with MC doesnt have to be hard or mean missing out - if we tweak/adapt how we prepare and serve meals it doesnt have to be obvious that you are accommodating a restricted eating plan.
In the words of Charles Darwin: It is not the strongest of the species that survive, not the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change
the other thing I have found, as I became relaxed at peace with my eating plan and lifestyle choices - most people dont question it.
true friends know I work really hard to have the wellness that I have, and I am protective of that wellness.
One thing I do is bulk cook ups on the weekend so I have all my 'basics' for the week. This way through the week (as I work full time) I only have to reheat meals rather than do prep and cooking. This may help for you, that you can eat with your husband but you just have to reheat your meal.
so far as socialising. Depending on the situation /people / etc.
- sometimes I eat a large meal before going out and take a platter of 'Gabes safe' snacks to share at the occasion
- if it is formal eating, I take my own meal (all my friends know my situation and are not offended)
- a very Australian thing is cooking meat on the grill (we call it bbq) I have Gabes safe cuts pre cooked wrapped in foil that I warm on the bbq (having the foil between my food and the bbq plate protects it from vegetable oil / sauces etc that might be on the other food)
if entertaining at home, I have come up with tasty meals that are Gabes safe and others enjoy.
1. roasted chicken quarters with roast veggies (served with Gluten free gravy)
2. roasted veggies with fresh salmon (my version of fish and chips). I cook the veges in Duck fat and this gives them lovely flavour
3. pretty much any meat and veges that is 'Gabes safe' and then I have things like mustard/sauces should the other eaters want more flavour that can be added at the table.
if it is nice cuts of meat, and veges are roasted with safe fat/oil and salt there is loads of flavour.
I have adapted many recipes for sweet treats and deserts. having processed GF flours is a treat for me. generally when I prepare these items people dont even know they are gluten and dairy free!!
now that grazing boards are a entertainment fad (they are here in Aus) it is easy to prepare nibbles grazing board, or a desert grazing board and one end is the 'Gabes safe' options.
Life with MC doesnt have to be hard or mean missing out - if we tweak/adapt how we prepare and serve meals it doesnt have to be obvious that you are accommodating a restricted eating plan.
In the words of Charles Darwin: It is not the strongest of the species that survive, not the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change
the other thing I have found, as I became relaxed at peace with my eating plan and lifestyle choices - most people dont question it.
true friends know I work really hard to have the wellness that I have, and I am protective of that wellness.
Gabes Ryan
"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned"
Dalai Lama
"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned"
Dalai Lama