The Power Of The Internet

[tex]

Polly,

You made the following statement in a response to one of Joe's threads. It struck a chord in me, and I thought it was worthy of it's own topic.

It amazes me that I feel incredibly close to so many here - in some cases as close or even closer than to friends I have known for a lifetime.

That's a very profound statement, and you're obviously not alone in feeling that sentiment. I think I can explain why.

None of us have to be here, at least not if we're in remission, and yet, here we are. Apparently, we're here of our own choosing, not because we feel obligated to be here.

When you analyze his situation - it apparently amounts to a form of unconditional love, not unlike the unconditional love that we receive from a faithful dog, or cat, or whatever, (though I have to admit that after being owned by countless cats over the years, I have a hunch that a lot of them don't really love us all that much, they just put up with us, because they recognize a good deal when they see one, and they know how to exploit it to the fullest advantage - cats are pretty independent characters. )

Anyway, I'm pretty sure that this psychological concept is the primary reason why so many of us feel such close ties to others here. Others who, without the connection through this board, would be, as you say, total strangers.

It's a unique feeling, and a unique situation - there's nothing else quite like it, anywhere in the world, and I feel so very fortunate that I am able to be a part of it.

Or, am I all wet? Is there some other reason behind this phenomenon?

Love,
Tex

[Joefnh]

Polly,

You made the following statement in a response to one of Joe's threads. It struck a chord in me, and I thought it was worthy of it's own topic.....

When you analyze his situation - it apparently amounts to a form of unconditional love......

Tex great thread and so true... I am confused a bit by the term "analyze his situation". Could you expand on this a bit?

--Joe

[tex]

Joe,

Well, I didn't intend to imply that a careful, scientific exploration was required. I initially said "When you 'look at' this situation", but "look at" appeared to be a somewhat unsophisticated, (shallow), description for the job at hand, so I changed it to "analyze", so that everyone would think that I had at least given it a little thought before posting. IOW, I couldn't decide on a perfect choice of words for that part of the sentence, while trying to avoid violating any rules of proper syntax, when I was composing the phrase. Probably, it would have been more appropriate to use a term such as "examine", "think about", "evaluate", "consider", or maybe "assay", but for some reason or other, I selected "analyze".

Tex

[Joefnh]

Hi Tex, thanks for the reply. I was not after the analysis / science angle at all here, I'm not that scientific (I hope).

I guess I was looking at my situation as it related to that post, and your comment regarding unconditional love which is shared by the friends here. You are right that really is a significant part of the group here and does play a part in our conversations and online relationships here. This really is a unique site with an extraordinary group of people.

--Joe

[Celie]

It is powerful. I am new here and you don't know me yet, but you are all willing to help me struggle with this frustrating and overwhelming condition. The gift of your experience is amazing! Thank you!

Celie

[grannyh]

This really is an amazing place!

Ridiculous when we all suffer from the same illness for which there is NO cure that any doctor would be offended at our searches here for help! So happy that my family doctor and GI doc are OK with this site.. there are more suggestions here for roads to getting ones life back than you could get from a roomful of "specialists" with very expensive degree:)

Thank you all for your support.. you kept me going when things were pretty bleak!
grannyh

[Polly]

Thanks for starting this thread, Tex.

When I have visited other support websites, regardless of the topic, I have not noticed the same degree of respect, empathy, and yes, love, that we experience here. It truly is unique. You will all probably laugh at this, but at times I have actually wondered if the genes that cause us to have MC and food intolerances might also confer some exceptional degree of compassion. It is not just one or two, or a handful of special folks here - it seems to me that everyone is extraordinary in countless ways.

I have been in remission for years now, but my gut remains my target organ (for stress). So, when Rusty passed 2 weeks ago my gut was in knots and the D came back in force (it still hasn't totally straightened out but is much better). I can't tell you how much it meant to me (and my gut) to receive the lovely condolence notes from all of you - almost 50 people responded. I was touched beyond words and have printed out that thread to keep in Rusty's memory.

Love,

Polly

[Kari]

One saying that comes to mind for me is "misery loves company":). Since my MC kept worsening over the years, the quality of my life kept going downhill. I didn't know anyone else with this condition, so I had no one to talk to who could really relate to what I was going through. It is treated so lightly by the medical community that I've always felt I'm a whiner if I complain about it. I have 5 older sisters, and every one of them suffers from a more serious condition, so I always feel funny if I bring up how sick and tired I am of feeling sick and tired:).

I think that the combination of hearing from people who can relate to this miserable condition, as well as the good natured, can do, attitude and friendliness on this board is a win win formula. I'm sure most of us have found this thread because we are motivated to take charge of our own health and well being - that makes for a pretty positive, encouraging crowd. Also, the amount of collective knowledge available here is extremely helpful to those of us who are fortunate enough to stumble across it in our desperate search for help.

A special THANK YOU to those of you who are responsible for organizing and running this forum - keep up the good work!!!!!

Kari

[mia]

Well- my take on it is that we're all like brothers and sisters. We're all sort of 'related' by our 'disease', and experiences that are unique to our group (people who REALLY do know what you mean, and how you feel). We really can understand each other. And so because of that, we care about each other. When I read posts from the people on this board; I imagine the person behind the post: a turn of phrase, a way of expressing a thought, as well as the things that are said, contribute to my picture. Intelligence, nobleness of character, fortitude, vulnerability, compassion, generosity, kindness, bravery; all of these things, and so much more come through. We reveal things, and discuss things that we don't readily show MOST people we know in 'real' life. It seems we are all on this journey together, and sometimes the journey can feel like the deep, dark woods; but no matter where you are, or how long you've been away, this is always a safe, and healing place to come to when you need to gather strength to go on.

Love from Mia

[mia]

bump
(this one is worth bumping up to keep going)
:)

[tex]

Joe,

I have to apologize. I read that quote several times, and obviously the experts are right - I totally overlooked the typo every time. Every time I read it, it looked correct. So I couldn't figure out what you meant. I just now scrutinized it again, and I finally caught it. The phrase "analyze his situation" was supposed to say "analyze this situation". No wonder I confused you. Sorry for the confusion, and I can't believe that it took me so long to see the problem.

I guess that just goes to show that we see what we expect to see.

Again, sorry for being so dense.

Tex

[tex]

You will all probably laugh at this, but at times I have actually wondered if the genes that cause us to have MC and food intolerances might also confer some exceptional degree of compassion. It is not just one or two, or a handful of special folks here - it seems to me that everyone is extraordinary in countless ways.

I'm not laughing, because I have wondered the same thing myself, due to changes in my own personality. I think that you might be on to something. Just imagine what might happen if all the leaders in government, and all the members of legislatures in every nation, were to suddenly develop MC. The world would surely become an awesome place, before a year or two had passed.

And as a side benefit, many millions of dollars would surely be diverted to special programs devoted to developing the most user-friendly toilet paper, that the world has ever seen.

Love,
Tex

[hoosier1]

There are a few world leaders (who shall remain nameless) whom I would like to see contract this problem..... kidding.... Kind of.

[Joefnh]

Tex thanks for finding that. I had re-read it several times trying to make sense of it but figured i was just too tired tonight.

I always do that in my reports at work.. We know what we said in our mind therefore it must be what we typed right??

Thanks for starting this thread, it is good one.

-Joe

[ant]

Dear Polly

So, when Rusty passed 2 weeks ago my gut was in knots and the D came back in force (it still hasn't totally straightened out but is much better)

Hope it is soon back to normal (norman). Thinking of you. best, ant