Colonoscopy Humor

Please post any jokes that have been found to be helpful in relieving the symptoms of Microscopic Colitis in this area. Please make sure that they are rated G or PG, as we have members of all ages, and various backgrounds in this diverse group. Any joke that fails this ratings test can be posted in the X-Rated Room, where access is restricted to those in the proper age group, who are comfortable with such jokes.

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Mars
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Colonoscopy Humor

Post by Mars »

A physician claims these are actual comments from his patients made while he was performing colonoscopies:

1. "Take it easy Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone
before!"

2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

4. "Oh boy, that was sphincterrific!"

5. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

6. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."

7. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

8. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out. You do the Hokey Pokey...."

9. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

10."If your hand doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

11. "Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

12. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

13. "Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not, in fact, up there?"
"Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful." -- Buddha
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