My 93 year old Mother broke her hip

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tex
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Post by tex »

Hmmmmm. 750 bucks a night to do nothing, sounds like a pretty good racket. Maybe I should see about getting into that line of work. Wait - they can't call it work, since no work is involved. What a deal - for the nursing home, (the "sitter" probably gets minimum wage).

I'm glad things are looking better this morning.

Tex
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Post by JLH »

Your typo scared me. :shock: I thought I'd written that by mistake.

My sister isn't even allowed to help Mom back and forth to the bathroom. It has to be someone insured!
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Joan
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Post by JLH »

DB just said it was "only" $124.50 per night.......
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Joan
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Post by Gloria »

Don't get me started on nursing homes... My SIL just called and said she is very reluctantly putting my MIL in one. I hope she'll get decent care.

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Post by Lucy »

That means the admin costs (liability, etc.) are about half, the sitter gets about half. I call it the new welfare. They didn't deserve minimum wage, but made alot more. NONE of ours (dozens of them we tried) could stay awake at night to watch when it was manditory (to Mother's life) they do so -- I couldn't sleep anyway, so I fired the company, and later hired several people during the day, on our own outside of the agency.

The supervisory visits were a joke -- all paperwork. They spent alot of my time just filling out paperwork for the state, mostly and BS'ing. When they asked to look at the patient, that's all they did. None of them has actually ever asked to see her skin condition, although they ask me so they can fill out the paper. Most never even look under the top sheet.

After the night aides were fired after Mom's hospitalization, I would sleep a few hours when my sister was home at night after work, then get up to watch her all night and while my sister was at work during the day, usually til fairly late in the evening, unfortunately.

I'd been awake for 24 hours a day for two weeks in a row in the hospital right before the home health aides were called in on her discharge. After 6 weeks, she didn't have to be watched quite so closely as her tract had formed by then -- she couldn't tolerate another surgery to replace her tummy tube until she could eat again through her mouth, if she'd been able to reach down and pull that freshly inserted tube out. She came very close during that time. I probably would be in jail for murder if they had let that tube come out, so that's why I got rid of them. (Ha! Just kidding, but not funny!)

Now we have a wonderful true Christian lady who reallly doesn't have to do this kind of work. She has a true servant's heart like Christ's. She reflects his love in her work. We are sooo blessed, I can't tell you!

Hope things get better for you all soon.
Yours, Luce
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Post by JLH »

I think our nightmare is just beginning. Her Long Term Care policy doesn't cover a person to watch her at night in the nursing home and call an aide when needed.

DB and DSis are at an orientation meeting at the nursing home right now.

BTW, DSis said the PT said, "Your Mother is amazing!"
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Joan
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Post by Jan »

Dear Joan,

I know how hard this all is for you and your family. When my Mom was in the hospital my sister and I took turns spending the night. I wanted to make sure she got the right pill and treatments.

I had an Aunt who fell and broke her hip. Some of your Mom's reactions are similar to things she would pull. She had a catheter and would pull it out during the night. After she got into the rehab facility she would do the same thing. She also fell several times trying to get up when she was suppose to stay in bed. I don't know if the anesthesia affects their reasoning skills or what.

I know you will be anxious to go see her and see what you can do to help. Your whole family is in my prayers.

Jan
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tex
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Post by tex »

Joan,

Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. That was a bad typo, wasn't it. :roll:

Tex
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It is suspected that some of the hardest material known to science can be found in the skulls of GI specialists who insist that diet has nothing to do with the treatment of microscopic colitis.
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Post by JLH »

Thanks so much everyone. We'll get through this all somehow. :???:
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Joan
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Post by Gloria »

My mother pulled out her IV and her Pic line - she had one put in three times. The third time I bought a velcro elbow band so she couldn't see the line. She finally kept it in.

Apparently hospitals can restrain their patients, but nursing homes cannot. After the she pulled out her IV, the hospital put her hands in restraints. The nursing home got tired of her being ambulatory, so they put the rails up on her bed. It was illegal and every time I came I told them to put them down. They eventually succeeded in keeping her in bed long enough that she lost her ability to walk and was wheelchair-bound.

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Post by JLH »

Those stories are really scary.

My sister wants to keep Mom at home with 24 hour care once she gets out of the nursing home. I just hope some of the women who cared for others in my Mom's apartment building are available if we go that route.

One caretaker had to go home to care for her own father.
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Joan
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Post by Lucy »

There are some really good people out there with values, but you have to be willing to immediately fire people at the first sign of inability and mostly unwillingness to do the job, or any sign of character deficit. I would say that MOST of the many we had out were character-challenged. Poor things, they can't help it. Ha!

First clean out the house of anything of any value that you don't HAVE to have available for your mother. If you are not going to be present while the caregiver is alone with your mother, then be sure to stall all the hidden cameras you need to observe what is or isn't being done for her in the appropriate areas of the house. You can monitor form your office computer just like Mothers do with sitters for their children at home.

Write out specific instructions for what they are supposed to do on a regular basis, and have them sign and date it. Update as necessary. You will need to be available to show them exactly how to do each task and why for as long as it takes for them to catch on. Maybe your mother's care won't be all that complicated. You will need to watch for people falling asleep while on duty. You can't see a patient get up when your eye lids are closed, and you can't hear when you are asleep, particularly if you are snoring loudly.

Watch out for people who look like they've never exercised in their lives, and bring picnic baskets with them like they are feeding a family of six for their meals. Smokers can be a real pain because they'll want to go out and smoke often, taking their eyes off the patient. Either that, or they will go ahead and smoke in your house, or take the patient out when it's not the best thing for the patient.

Ask them how many cell phone calls they will need to make while there. Make sure they are necessary and kept to a bare minimum. Alot of them will sit on their ____ talking incessantly on the phone just for socialization. Others will watch what they want to watch on tv, without regard to the patient's preferences.

Another thing that has happened to other patients who lived totally alone using our agency is that the evening shift would put their patients in bed for the night, then leave early, and the night shift would be there much later, leaving the patient unobserved for a pretty good while. Somehow they were caught. These were primarily a group of Nigerian women who all knew each other and wouldn't rat on each other. Too bad they lacked integrity because some of them had the skills and intelligence to really be good caregivers. Someone must've observed them leaving early and reported them to the agency. I doubt they were even fired, knowing this agency. This is another reason to install cameras. For the phone calls and anything involving an un-authorized visitor to the house, it probably wouldn't hurt to have hidden microphones to pick up contents of conversations to use as evidence, should anything legal come up, particularly criminal activity.

Hate to be bringing all this negative information into the conversation, but it's best you know ahead of time to avoid the common pitfalls.

You might want to check around at some of the churches in your area. There are alot of people who have lost jobs in the workplace who aren't afraid they are going to do a little work. Churches will often know who is looking for work.
Just because they don't have the certification, doesn't mean they can't surpass those who are certified caregivers. Most will probably be better if you can just show them exactly what you want. I would still get references, because churches don't always know about a person's character and past. Most will probably see it as a ministry. They might feel a bit inadequate if they have to do anything medical, but most people aren't afraid to give medications if they are half way intelligent and there's nothing complicated about it.

Do a background check on whoever you hire outside of an agency. They are supposed to do those, but I doubt they actually do a very good one.

Good luck!
Luce
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Post by JLH »

YIKES, I hope one of the women who cared for a couple of ladies in my Mom's apartment building will be available. One of them went to help out her own father.

I'm sending your post to DB and DSis.

Thank you.
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Joan
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Post by Rosie »

Wow, Luce, what an eye-opener about problems with agencies! :shock: I hope that I never have to depend on such care-givers when I get older, especially if there isn't family to keep a very close eye on them.

Going through a church is a great idea. That's how my sister-in-law found an in-home caregiver for my mother-in-law after a stroke. This woman wasn't the brightest person, but was honest and well-meaning. She wasn't certified, but didn't need to be since she was just doing basic custodial care. She had worked this sort of position for most of her life, and had a known reputation. After my mother-in-law died, she went on to other care-taker jobs found through the church too.

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Post by jodibelle352 »

Joan:
Keeping your Mom and all of you in my prayers that all goes very well and the recovery is a breeze!
Love and God Bless:
Jodi :angelpraying:
May God and All His Angels, watchover, protect and guide you "One Day At A Time".
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