Dr. Quack

Please post any jokes that have been found to be helpful in relieving the symptoms of Microscopic Colitis in this area. Please make sure that they are rated G or PG, as we have members of all ages, and various backgrounds in this diverse group. Any joke that fails this ratings test can be posted in the X-Rated Room, where access is restricted to those in the proper age group, who are comfortable with such jokes.

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Peggy
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Dr. Quack

Post by Peggy »

Dr. Quack will see you now. :doctor:

He is very good. If you tell him you want a second opinion, he will go out and come in again.
 
He treated one woman for yellow jaundice for three years before he realized she was Chinese.
 
Another time he gave a patient six months to live.  At the end of the six months, the patient hadn't paid his bill, so the doctor gave him another six months.
 
While he was talking to me his nurse came in and said, "Doctor, there  is a man here who thinks he is invisible." The doctor said, "Tell him
I can't see him."
 
Another time a man came running in the office and yelled, "Doctor, doctor, my son just swallowed a roll of film." The doctor calmly replied, "Let's just wait and see what develops."
 
One patient came in and said, "Doctor, I have a serious memory problem." The doctor asked, "When did it start?" The man replied "When did what start?"
 
I remember one time I told my doctor I had a ringing in my ears. His advice: Don't answer it.
 
My doctor sure has his share of nut cases. One said to him, "Doctor,  I think I'm a bell." The doctor gave him some pills and said, "Here, take these.  If they don't work, give me a ring."
 
Another guy told the doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards. The doctor simply said, "Go sit over there. I'll deal with you later."
 
When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places, he told me to stop going to those places.
 
You know, doctors can be so frustrating.  You wait a month and a half for an appointment he says, "I wish you had come to me sooner."
:pigtail:
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tex
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Location: Central Texas

Post by tex »

Hahahahahaha. Thanks for a good laugh session.

Tex
:cowboy:

It is suspected that some of the hardest material known to science can be found in the skulls of GI specialists who insist that diet has nothing to do with the treatment of microscopic colitis.
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Joy Adcock
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Joined: Sun May 21, 2017 12:52 am
Location: Ellsworth Kansas

Post by Joy Adcock »

:lol:
Premature Ovarian Failure at 32, Superficial Malignant Melanoma at 40, LC at 41. Severe osteoporosis of lower spine at 52, Hypothyroidism at 53. :mallet:
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